I forgot today was judgement day until reading about it this morning (as prophesised in this factual and informative guide - http://www.ebiblefellowship.com/outreach/tracts/may21/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;).

Considering I never took the chance to give myself to God, and considering that I didn't ascend to heaven this morning, I guess it means that I'm gonna be around until the worlds end in October.

Was just wondering who else wasn't deemed good enough to get to heaven, and how are you finding all the smiting of the Earth that God has started doing today?

For those of you who are unsure whether or not you qualify.....just check this handy flowchart:

God tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he's pretty sure you're fucked.

Kick-off isn't until 6pm (no matter where in the world you live, conveniently) so we've got a few hours to wait yet. I've just had a fry-up and a haircut so I'm all set

Spit wrote:Kick-off isn't until 6pm (no matter where in the world you live, conveniently) so we've got a few hours to wait yet. I've just had a fry-up and a haircut so I'm all set

Ah, thanks Spit, didn't realise that the Rapture was not till the evening... that means I've got two hours to try to sell myself to the almighty.

Do you think I should wear a suit and shirt, or are jeans and a tshirt ok? I do hope there's not a dress code. Probably doesn't matter anyway - Lys's awesome flowchart has demonstrated to me multiple routes by which I can't get there anyway.

Dtlv74 wrote:

Spit wrote:Kick-off isn't until 6pm (no matter where in the world you live, conveniently) so we've got a few hours to wait yet. I've just had a fry-up and a haircut so I'm all set

Ah, thanks Spit, didn't realise that the Rapture was not till the evening... that means I've got two hours to try to sell myself to the almighty.

Do you think I should wear a suit and shirt, or are jeans and a tshirt ok? I do hope there's not a dress code. Probably doesn't matter anyway - Lys's awesome flowchart has demonstrated to me multiple routes by which I can't get there anyway.

Why, are you on your period?

As for dress code, I'm thinking Imperial Leisure:

I was divorced , but my first wife was the dvel incarnate and I've now married an angel so surely I can't be left behind ?

Im prety sure imstill alive but my fcuk does my head hurt. Possibly a smiting but probably just that bottle of wine!

Looks like we're all still here.

Am not shocked.

A lot of gullable people taking it on board and depleting their savings for this which I find odd as giving it away is hardly going to make a difference if you truely believed the end of the world was nigh.

Apparently we now have until 21st October to repent...

Good. November's a shit month anyway.

Alex wrote:A lot of gullable people taking it on board and depleting their savings for this which I find odd as giving it away is hardly going to make a difference if you truely believed the end of the world was nigh.

Apparently we now have until 21st October to repent...

I thought there was meant to be a seconding coming when jesus returned, what bible is this all from?

Craig wrote:

Alex wrote:A lot of gullable people taking it on board and depleting their savings for this which I find odd as giving it away is hardly going to make a difference if you truely believed the end of the world was nigh.

Apparently we now have until 21st October to repent...

I thought there was meant to be a seconding coming when jesus returned, what bible is this all from?

Think you're right.

2nd Coming. Rapture. Everyone else left dies before the year is out.